- Home
- Aguirre, Forrest
Fossiloctopus Page 6
Fossiloctopus Read online
Page 6
June:
Continuing our quest for exotic submarine artifacts, Aimee and I traveled to Istanbul, a city whose sights and scents are, thus far, the most unlike home that we have seen or smelled. The Ottomans, contrary to Hollywood's condescending imaginings, were early adapters of technology, especially when it came to weapons of war. They were, in fact, the first nation to fire a torpedo underwater, from the submarine Abdülhamid, in 1886. The negotiations for the current lot of offerings were altogether too long, and I fear that our host, Ismael Omar, held my wife for an inordinately excessive period of time to bargain over the goods. Nevertheless, she returned with Omar in good spirits, both parties smiling, satisfied with the deal. I do not trust the man, for some reason, but my wife assures me that the items we received are genuine. They are a set of tassels from the fez caps worn by the crew of the Abdülhamid. Their tattered appearance speaks to their authenticity. This is the real deal, folks, and Aimee again bargained hard to get them.
July:
It's funny how we sometimes quarrel over the little things. Even Benito Mussolini, the pompous Italian fascist, realized that small things might be used to advantage in a fight. During World War II, the Italian navy, such as it was, used midget submarines to attack ships at Gibraltar. Now, while we wish we had something as large as a midget submarine to send to our subscribers, we find that their scarcity, along with shipping costs, would prove preventative to fulfilling our (and your, we presume) wishes. We might have the next best thing, though. This month we are sending out portions of a handwritten letter by Mussolini himself, all authentic, though only a lucky few will receive the portion of the letter mentioning the miniature submarines. Good luck!
August:
While some of our subscribers were lucky enough to receive a "submarine" portion of Mussolini's letter last month, some were not so fortunate. I understand about bad luck, believe me. I often seem to have the bad luck of being associated with the wrong people. My wife tries to make up for me in this regard. Those British sailors of the "K' class submarines understand your plight, my plight, as well. Their submarines, which saw combat during World War I, were known for bad luck. This month we will be sending out the lucky rabbit's feet straight from the helms of these "K" class subs. The feet were collected when the unfortunate vessels were decommissioned after the ignominious years of The Great War.
September:
Years after "The War to End All Wars," the Soviet nuclear submarine K19 was the first Soviet sub to make it to the North Pole. While this submarine was once the pride of the fleet and a barely-veiled symbol of masculinity and power in its prime, a series of radiation leaks led to its decommission in middle age. The hull was scuttled, and we herewith include a framed metal fragment from a former superpower's greatest underwater pioneer, long may she rest in peace.
October:
In 1944, the submarines USS Tang and USS Tullibee were hit by their own Mark 18 torpedoes, which came full-circle from their launch tubes and caught the boats amidships. There's nothing quite so harrowing as your own weapon turning and bearing down on you. Still, you, the faithful subscribers, become the beneficiaries by owning another piece of history, a symbol of betrayal abroad, the propeller blades of a Mark 18 torpedo, each etched with a silhouette representation of the submarines they hit.
November:
Back to the Middle East, this time alone, to retrieve a chest full of sea-worn glass shards that once constituted a glass diving-bell presumably used by Alexander the Great's forces to reconnoiter the enemy at the Siege of Tyre in 332 BC. This is the oldest artifact I have ever presented to my subscribers. I only wish that the pieces were better preserved, more whole, but things of such an age are so fragile that they are easily shattered, not unlike trust in a relationship.
December:
I wish I could pin this month's items to an anniversary, but I cannot, from here on out, think of anniversaries. I must not. Time is short, but let me explain. In this business, you sometimes must take what you are given when it is given, strike while the iron's hot, as they say. When I found the possibility of procuring these morbid beauties, I had to make a quick decision to grab them. In August of 2000, the Russian submarine Kursk sank in the Barents Sea due to the accidental explosion of a number of torpedoes. The explosion was strong enough to be detected by seismographs. Though most of the crew died in the initial blasts, several of them held on for several days awaiting a rescue that was too slow to save them, mainly due to Russia's stubborn resistance to several offers of help from the international community. Ultimately, those who had survived the explosions slowly died of suffocation as oxygen ran out. One can only imagine their final hours in that dark place, deep beneath the murky sea, eyes wide with fear as their breath was squeezed out of them. This will be my final shipment to each of you, as my business partnership with Aimee is at a dead end. Please accept, as your final subscription's issue, one of 24 authentic teeth from victims of the Kursk disaster, each mailed in a medicine bottle, the information appearing on the label being of no consequence to you. And now, I sail off alone. It's been an . . . interesting ride. Bon Voyage!
###
About the Author:
Forrest Aguirre’s fiction has been published in over fifty magazines and anthologies. His work has received honorable mentions in several Year’s Best anthologies and he was a finalist for the StorySouth Million Writers Award. Forrest is also a World Fantasy Award recipient and Philip K. Dick Award finalist for his editing of the Leviathan 3 anthology with co-editor Jeff VanderMeer. Forrest lives in Madison, Wisconsin with his wife, children, and ferret.
Discover other titles by Forrest Aguirre at Smashwords.com
Connect with me online:
https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/forrestaguirre
Google+: Forrest Aguirre
Blog: forrestaguirre.blogspot.com
Twitter: @Forrestaguirre
The stories in this volume originally appeared in the following venues:
The Bones of Ndundi: Notre Dame Review
Fossiloctopus: Gargoyle
Four Canopus: Exquisite Corpse
Jamalerdapala’s Refractor: American Letters & Commentary
Kaleidoscopes of Africa: 3rd Bed
Keys I Don’t Remember: Polyphony
Nancy Davis’ Bridal Veil: Previously Unpublished
The Seven Tattoos of Inisto Cantaglia: Prague Literary Review
Strange Fruit: Cafe Irreal
Submissions Status: Diagram
Subscription: Pear Noir!